"Work/Life Balance": A Skewed Perspective!

I've been chewing on this topic for a while now, and part of today's Daily OM finally prompted me to dive in:

"Balance helps us avoid becoming lost in what we enjoy while ensuring that we always have enough mental and physical energy to explore new forms of fulfillment. While we recognize the importance of those concerns that are related to our basic survival and our overall well-being, we also understand that no one activity or obligation can take precedence over another. We are complex beings with complex needs, which means that our health and our wellness is a product of the many different choices we have made during our lifetimes. Dividing our time between areas of focus is the best way to guarantee that we are doing all we can to take care of ourselves in a thorough manner."

So then, if that's true, which I personally believe it is, what's up with the phrase "work/life balance"? That, to me, indicates that in the pie of our lives, work takes up 50% and the rest of life (family, health, fun/recreation, home, hobbies, friends, personal growth, travel, etc.) squeezes into the remaining 50%. How have we gotten so off course?

I think we're entering into the conversation from a skewed perspective when we go through the doorway marked "work/life balance." We are human beings...complex human beings. We require well-roundedness expressed in all facets of our lives in order to truly find balance in our physical, mental, emotional and spiritual selves. When any one of those areas is neglected, we are out of whack, if not screamingly on the surface than at the very least secretly deep inside. The result? Stress-related dis-ease, failed or ultimately unfulfilling relationships, physical maladies, disconnection from anything "bigger out there," even if, for you, that's simply the rest of humanity.

Susan Jeffers, in her impactful little book Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway! has an entire chapter devoted to the question, "How Whole is Your 'Whole Life'?" In it, she introduces a simple nine-block grid that represents a person's life. Each block is labeled with a different area of life, such as hobby, leisure, family, alone time, work, relationship, friends, personal growth, and contribution. When any one of these blocks takes over more than its allotted space, she posits, then it threatens to become our identity. And we then succumb to a "fear of losing" and neediness mentality that can be all-encompassing. So we run around our lives doing everything we can to not lose that job, relationship, etc., to the detriment of the rest of our lives, and probably in a way that isn't in concert with who we'd really like to be. She offers a great seven step process to regain balance, and encourages her readers to "continue to create such richness for yourself that nothing can ever take away your basic sense of completeness. Can you imagine how little you would then have to fear?"

Another tool to determine the current state of balance (or imbalance!) in your life is the "Wheel of Life." It's an easy way to get a birds-eye view of where you might be neglecting an area or two for another, and a starting point for taking corrective action.

However you go about it, I challenge you today to take a hard look at your life. If we stepped into the conversation from the perspective of "whole life balance," what would you need to change? And what would make it worth the effort?

Go for it!!!